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Are you a wanker?
Do you even know what a wanker is?
Have you ever done the following:
Proudly admit you dropped out in the 8th grade (at age 16) and insist "I'm a smart bastard"?
Admit you dropped out in the 8th grade (at age 16) while hanging your head in shame?
Admit you dropped out in the 8th grade but you got your GED so it's all gravy?
None of the above, you graduated from high school or got your GED and are proud of it!
When writing an e-mail, do you:
Grossly misspell words, forget about capitalization, it's too much work and not care?
Grossly misspell words but don't know how to use spell check?
Grossly misspell words but spellcheck catches them before you hit send?
Spell all words correctly, use proper punctuation and capitalization all by your lonesome?
When you're wrong and you know it, which of the following to do you do:
Blame anyone and everyone else, you're perfect even though you proudly dropped out in the 8th grade (at age 16)?
Blame your ex-wife/husband, they're the root of all evil?
Blame your ex-wife/husband, they're out to get you after 20 years?
Admit you were wrong and apologize for being human?
You decide to waste gobs of money paying an unoriginal web designer (who steals others' ideas) to make you a web page. What is the main topic?
Your ex-wife/husband, they're EVIL!
Your ex-wife/husband, it's been a long 20 years, but the hate is still going strong. (and you have no life, so why not?)
Long hours spent fishing, cussing like a sailor and drinking "manly" alcoholic beverages at the nearest bar.
Your life as it is, family, friends, etc., etc.
You've been living off social security checks and living with your 80 year old mother, it's time to strike out on your own. You need a job. Do you:
Pick up applications and have your little sister fill them out cause you dropped out in the 8th grade and don't know what 'previous job history' means?
Pick up applications and have the nearest sucker fill them out for you, hey you're still dumb having dropped out in the 8th grade and all?
Skip the job and move in with your alcoholic friend, who wants to work?
Pick up the applications, fill them out, get hired, get paid, move out?
You did/said something insanely stupid and someone called you on it. What do you do?
Rebut with "Well my girlfriend is a nurse and she went to 'collage'."
Reply with "I may have only been to the 7th grade but I'm a smart bastard."
Tell them, "Yeah well I have cartoons of you on my web page and I made them look like you are screwing animals and there's nothing you can do about it because it's my first amendment rights."
Laugh it off, life goes on.
You grossly insulted someone in your family for no reason at all and they tell you to shove it, how do you reply?
Threaten them with a lawyer.
Threaten them with the 1st amendment.
Sinisterly tell them "You'll pay for that...and your pretty dog too!" then laugh like a lunatic.
Tell them why you insulted them (you were joking or they pissed you off), that you're sorry and it won't happen again.
None of the above
You're a wanker aren't you?
NO!! It's my ex-wife/husband! They're out to get me!
What's a wanker?
Well, maybe a little bit.
Um, I don't think so?
You like to hang out on the net and frequent the chat rooms. Are you honest about who you are, where you live and what you do?
Hell no, them bitches appreciate a good liar.
Hell no, them bitches like what I tell them to like.
Yes, I really DO have six pack abs, buns of steal and a mane of thick silky dark hair! Oh and I'm good friends with the Prez.
Umm, I don't tell people where I live. Can we say stalker?
Yes, I have nothing to hide and I'm proud of who I am. If they don't like it, they can take a hike!
You meet someone online and they fall for the pack of B.S. you've fed them. Now they want to meet you, what do you do?
Tell them you're in a body cast from the skydiving accident, it will be months before you can get out of the house.
Admit you're a pathetic bint who lives with your elderly mum and younger sister, they don't like visitors and you have an early curfew.
Two words, PUBLIC and PLACE.
Ummm, are you kidding? Can we say serial killer?
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