Sexual Needs and Communications

Question 1:   Does the discussion of sexual issues in your relationship often result in a fight about morals, values, or other alleged personality traits?
Yes, Always.
Yes, regarding issues that are “sensitive” or that the other person doesn’t understand.
Sometimes, depending on our moods.
Not generally, we can discuss almost anything.
Never. We can talk about sex as easily as we talk about the weather.

Question 2:   Do you talk during your sexual contacts?
We don’t do any talking, and the lights are usually off.
Talking is limited to telling the other person “No, I don’t like that or won’t do something”.
Some talking, though not really a “conversation”, more like one person directing the other.
We can request or offer certain acts, and can end the session with a “Thank you!”
If our sessions were recorded, many would blush and there would be a need for censors.

Question 3:   What phrase best describes how you feel about your sexual contacts?
“I reluctantly do what is required of me.”
“I give in so that my partner stays in a good mood.”
“It is ‘mechanical’, something we do to provide a sexual release for one or both of us.”
“With enough effort by my partner, I’ll get in the mood and we’ll have fun.”
“We make love as an expression of our feelings for each other.”

Question 4:   How often do you have sexual contact?
Every few days.
At least every day.

Question 5:   What would you say prevents you from having sex more often?
One (or both) of us doesn’t like sex.
Our feelings for each other.
We don’t ‘need’ it more often.
Our lifestyles (kids, work schedules, other commitments) prevent more contact from being possible.
We need to take a break from sex occasionally.

Question 6:   How would you categorize your sexual repertoire with your partner?
Open to new things as long as it is not considered too “weird”.
Willing to try something new in the right setting.
Anything and everything is fair game.

Question 7:   Do you keep secrets from your partner in regards to your fantasies or desires?
Yes, it would only result in snide comments or feelings of insecurities.
Yes, because even I think they are things that may unusual.
Yes, I don’t think we need to share everything. Fantasies are personal and meant to be kept to one’s self.
Not many, but there are some things that I know my partner would not understand.
No, we tell each other everything, and even fantasize about them together.

Question 8:   Would you be willing to change your behavior, appearance, or sexual repertoire to help fulfill (some of) your partner’s fantasies?
No. If he/she don’t like what I have to offer, then I’m not willing to go the extra mile.
No. I’d feel insecure that there is something about me that is lacking in our relationship.
Maybe, if it were something that was not degrading, involved others, or went against my personal beliefs.
Sure, if it made our sex life more exciting and they were willing to do the same for me.
Yes, it sounds like fun.

Question 9:   Have you ever used, or be willing to use, a camera or video recorder while having sexual contact?
No. I would fear it would be used against me in some way.
No. I would not want to see myself or my partner doing such things.
Maybe, as long as it was never seen by anybody else.
Yes, I have but would not do it again (for whatever reason).
Yes, why not?

Question 10:   If you caught your partner pleasuring themself, what would your reaction be?
Anger, embarrassment, and revulsion. It might be an opportunity to tease or humiliate the person.
Insecurity and concern, and make like it did not even happen.
Would not care. It is a normal part of life.
Arousal, and I would want to watch.
We masturbate openly in front of each other.

This Quiz has been designed by Contemporary Counseling Services, L.L.C..