MST3000 Final Sacrifice Character Quiz

Enough LOTR and New Zealand! Who are you from Canada's epic saga, "The Final Sacrifice"?

Question 1:   The Canadian day begins, the birds are chirping and the smell of bacon is in the air. You're most likely to be:
Doing early morning voice-deepening exercises
Drunk, hung over, and unconscious
Removing lice from your beard
Getting ready for school

Question 2:   The rest of the world is going to work, and Canadians are going off to their jobs as fishing guides and mounties. You are:
Dreading the beatings that'll be coming from the big kindergarteners who come over to the high school to take your lunch money
Calling your evil henchmen to see if they can meet tonight for cookies
Drunk, hung over, and semiconscious
Panning for gold

Question 3:   Well, the morning went good, eh? How do you spend your afternoons? Anybody up for hockey?
Looking for more black clothes at Men's Wearhouse
Panning for some more gold
Recovering from the morning, midmorning, and late morning beatings and waiting for the lunch, after lunch, afternoon, late afternoon, and after school beatings
Drunk, hung over, and almost conscious

Question 4:   It's evening in Canada, what are you doing now? Besides staring at the aurora borealis or watching hockey, that is.
Drunk, hung over, and looking for beer
Petting the mule
Hunting down a drunken loser who thought he could leave your cult
Recovering from injuries and praying to Larry Csonka that everything will be okay

Question 5:   What's your preferred clothing?
The Canadian Tuxedo: Denim on Denim
Johnny Cash's usual crossed with Judge Doom's outfit from "Who Framed Roger Rabbit?"
Whatever mom says I should wear
Whatever they buried me in, hopefully my Dolphins jersey
Filthy skins of animals I killed and ate

Question 6:   What do you do for fun, hoser?
Drink... sometimes I drink, too
I play Everquest
Frighten people with my gravelly baritone
I'm dead, got it? I used to play football
Set my ticks on fire

Question 7:   In a dangerous situation, you:
Dropped the canteen and I got lost. Right on schedule.Ah, next I have to fall, break my ankle, be attacked by coyotes, and be buried by a bear.
Drink a little bit.
Are dead... dead dead dead dead dead
Yell "Get off my land, you damn smootchers!"
Are the one causing the danger to others... yes... yess..

Question 8:   When the Ziox come back, you'll be:
Wondering where you left that case of Pabst
Leading their conquering armies!
Crying for help, as usual
Still dead
Boring them to death with stories about how they used to rule the ancient lands where they lived... back in the times of the Ziox there used to be these things, you see...

Question 9:   Describe your best friend, eh?
It's like I've known Rowsdower forever... Rowsdower. Rowsdower! Rowsdower! Help! Rowsdower!
I don't have a best friend... If I had friends I probably wouldn't want to bring about the annihilation of all mankind. Well, Saskatchewan, anyway.
There's this obnoxious kid who follows me around, but my friends are Miller and Busch and Bud and Colt and Molson and...
Probably dead too
There's this mouse that's been living in my hair for a while and I call him "Moisty"

Question 10:   What's your favorite crayola color?
Weenie yellow
Rotting fungus brown
I'm dead, got it?
Darth Vader black
Rusted pickup red

This Quiz has been designed by Gray Loki.