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Ghost in the Lake

4 Chapter - 1.911 Words - Developed by:
- Developed on: - 1,480 taken-The story is currently being written - 4 people like it

This is my first short story about a ghosts and blood, please enjoy.

It is about a blood thirsty ghost

1980 "We aren't supposed be back here at night. You do know that right?" "Chill! Quit being a cry baby. I have to go pee!" &q

"We aren't supposed be back here at night. You do know that right?"
"Chill! Quit being a cry baby. I have to go pee!"
"Why don't you do it behind our tent or something like that? Why do you have to go all the way to the lake. You know that Mr. Dave has forbidden going out to the lake at night when he's not around."
" 'Cause, I don't want them to hear me pee. God, whats wrong with you. We are 13 not 10."
"Ok, I just don't like it and if we get in trouble, I'm not part of it. Deal!"

Ten minutes later

"Do you hear that sound, Beans?"
"Yeah... Should we go or something?"
"I'm almost done. Hold on."
It was quiet for only one minute, then he heard something. A loud scream coming from the lake. Then a splash and a gurgle.
"Beans? You there?"
No sound and no answer....... just silence.
"Beans, this isn't funny and so not like you. Bean's! Where are you?"
Then he heard a sound of leaves and branches falling down and landing in the lake, which caused a big splash. He looked out to the lake and saw a person standing on it. Out of nowhere he heard a very creepy crackly voice behind him.
"I'm right behind you."
Then the voice lunged after him as he ran away.

Comments (5)


1309 days ago
That was amazing! I might be scared to go to our lake...................
1497 days ago
I love this story! It's sick!!! But if you put more description about the characters it would be even better!
1591 days ago
Thank you for ur advice, I really appreciate it. Here's my yopmail. Btown
1591 days ago
Told you I would read it ;). It’s very good. I noticed that every chapter has new characters, so one thing that would make it better is to have a main character each chapter and write out there thoughts and feelings and describe there actions. That way, there is a little more detail and not feeling so rushed. None the less, it is still a good story with a great theme!
1604 days ago
Please let me know if I should keep on writing this type of stuff and let me know how I could improve my writing.