My wife is irritated that I have no sense of direction.
So I packed my stuff and right.
Your dad is so talented, he got a 10 min. slow clap from Simon Cowell.
Yo mamma so stupid she got hit by a parked car.
Yo mama so old her first Christmas WAS the first Christmas.
Yo mamma so fat when she passed the T.V. I missed 3 episodes of my favorite show.
Yo mamma so fat they had to lay a blanket on the Pacific Ocean so she could sleep.
The most hilarious Harry Potter joke to exist
SIRIUS: I'm afraid a lot of people die in the last few books, Harry.
HARRY: Are you serious?
SIRIUS: I'm dead Sirius.