Am I Butch, Femme, Or Stem? Quiz

So you've figured out you're a lesbian ... . Congratulations! Now just one question remains: Are you butch, femme, or stem? Hopefully, this quiz can help you on your journey to self-discovery.
Disclaimer: Only you can determine whether you're butch, femme, or stem. This quiz is just a guide to help you along. It will only be useful to lesbians - others should try some different quizzes! Also, it won't be 100 percent accurate for everyone. It's a test, not a human being who can talk to you and learn everything about you.

  • 1
    Growing up, were you a tomboy or a girly-girl?
    Growing up, were you a tomboy or a girly-girl?
  • 2
    Which would you prefer to wear at your wedding?
  • 3
    Which role do you prefer to play in a relationship?

  • 4
    Which of these do you prefer to wear in your normal, day-to-day life? Choose the closest.
  • 5
    Whom do you prefer to have as a partner?
  • 6
    Do you prefer to take care of your partner, or to be taken care of by your partner?

  • 7
    Do you reject traditional femininity, or do you subvert it? (In other words, do you perform femininity for other women and not men, or do you not perform it at all?)
  • 8
    Which lesbian figure do you identify with/like the most?
  • 9
    Do you enjoy traditionally masculine activities or lines of work (mechanics, construction, etc.)?
  • 10
    Finally, what do you feel you are?

Comments (83)


945 days ago
Ummm I got femme and I'm think that's wrong because I am more on the butch side more then the femme side
956 days ago
HELLO. god im dumb. I recently learned ima lesbian. yay I havent acually come out yet but... i will. someday.. ANYWAYS i got stem. So . Im wish i could be butch but if i asked my mom "HEeY! I wAnt a SupeR sHoRt hAir" she would probally say no. :(
Sorry for such a long comment. BAIIIII
982 days ago
im a lesbian and sad my mom dont want me to be lesbian she said i cant like gurlz
989 days ago
I got femme and I was not happy, I want to be butch
1011 days ago
Where my lesbians at!
1011 days ago
Iā€™m a femme! Suits me! Also, to all of you who feel insecure about coming out to yourself, be true to ur self ok
1018 days ago
umm the quiz isn't just useful for lesbians because 'while the butch/femme label is often used by/associated with lesbians, it is also used by other groups in the LGBTQ+ community. This includes queer men and m-spec sapphics'.
1035 days ago got it wrong.
1044 days ago
Im getting more confused as days go by. The results was a great help but hell no, I need to be a girl because I am the only daughter and I have no siblings.
1054 days ago
welp im genderfluid pansexual toast so idk why im taking this quiz
1061 days ago
@ella same! im a butch lesbian who dates femmes, not the other way around!
1075 days ago
šŸ˜˜ i got femme as a result .nope not me ,im a butch lesbian who dates femmes
1097 days ago
I got masc lesbian that prefers dating femmes, but I'm down with dating other mascs too, as long as they ain't gonna try to top me.
1107 days ago
said i was a stem.. got that right babyyy wooooo less gooooo
1112 days ago
I feel like I'm a femme
1133 days ago
I'm definitely a femme who's into other femmes. I can't believe my results said I'm "a femme who most likely dates butch women". No, darling. I'm a femme who's into other femmes and other femmes only šŸ˜‚ā¤ļø
1136 days ago
im not a femme im a stem mainly stud
1137 days ago
iā€™m a femme!! i find myself buying skirts and lots of pink more than pants haha i also love other femmes, cute clothes to borrow :]
1149 days ago
Ok, here's my preferences:

Hair length - long
Role - dominant
Clothes - both (dresses and shorts with t-shirts are both nice)
Activities - both (feminine & masculine)

Honestly I prefer all people and I'm kinda in the middle
1152 days ago
I'm a stem, but am just myself.
And if anyone says I have to decide between femme or stud I will slap them in their face :)