Personality tests -» Are you this Star / Figure? -» Ancient historic characters

Which Great Ancient Are You?

15 Questions - Developed by: - Developed on: 2005-02-01 - 10,920 taken

Are you the Godlike Socrates? Would you burn Rome and eat small children? How about living in a wine jar? Would you even make it alive out of the 1st century A.D.? Find out here...

1

On a typical week you:

Eat some, talk some, fuck some. Tell Aristippus to learn to eat lentils and shut up already.
Assault some young Romans with your gang in dark alleys, drink a cup of blood, get worshipped some
Get your clothes touched by lepers a lot
Write a few poems, dance with a torch, sacrifice some
Get beaten up a few times for soliciting in the marketplace

2

During a truly exceptional week, you:

Tell Alexander the Great to sod off and bite him when he tries to pat you.
Sleep in some garden.
Burrrrn Rrrrrome! I'd do it more often, though.
Drink hemlock.
Win jars of olive oil, laurel wreaths and some money. Oh, you said "exceptional" week?

3

Your recreation involves:

Choir boys.
I don't do recreation.
Attending weddings.
Talking.
Petronius.

4

Your favourite person in history is:

Aeschylus.
Alcibiades, the naughty little bastard.
Mommy! Mommy!
Sod off.
Mommy.

5

You are:

A God!
You're a filthy cur, too.
A Greek!
I don't know.
I really can't tell you.

6

What is the ultimate meaning of life?

Beauty and piety. Wine is good, too.
You are not yet ready to know it. Come and hear the next sermon.
Sod the fuck OFF!
Self-control.
Art! Art! Art! (Whimper).

7

What's your place in the movies?

Peter Ustinov is ugly! (Cry).
Rrrrrrrrr... Rrrrrrrr... Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr... (Go for the jugular in an impressive leap).
Pasolini hurt my feelings.
Rossellini made one about me, why, yes.
I'm overused.

8

What do you look like?

I'm kind of shaggy. Want to shag?
You don't get to find out until the Middle Ages, really.
If I must tell you, I have been selected to dance at festivals for my exceptionally fine looks.
Rather like a satyr, or a fancy little box, or a stingray.
I am a work of art! (Though admittedly, I have a very thick neck).

9

Just how great are you, anyway?

Fuck that.
I am the Greatest.
I can't begin to tell you how great I am.
Greater than you are.
Quite, quite.

10

Are you finding this test a little long?

No! Keep asking about Me, Me, Me!
Yes, in fact, I've still got things to rehearse.
No time is too long for the knowledge of thyself.
I wasn't listening.
We have all the time in the world.

11

Men or Women?

Women.
There's a musical about that.
Oh, everything.
Choir boys and chastity.
Noble youths. We can intellectually masturbate together.

12

Do people like you?

Some of them. I love them all, though.
No, but they are stupid.
They love me. Don't they? Guards!
I don't like people.
They like me, but the gods are jealous.

13

Do you like kings?

I rape the children of Asian kings.
No, they smell bad.
No, not at all.
No, I am a servant of the Democracy.
I am one! (Oops).

14

Got a biographer?

Oh yes. At least two.
Diogenes Laertius can suck my...
Yes, I've got four.
Fragmentarily. There are of course the Lives of the Poets.
Have I got a biographer? I own every biographer on the three continents! Suetonius is a blackguard.

15

What are you wearing?

I can't remember.
Purple and gold.
Nothing, it's warm in here.
Flowing robes.
A white tunic and a wreath. Oh, sandals, too.

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