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And I'm sorry for not answering sooner I've just been going through a lot I haven't even been in town I've just been in hiding away from everyone including my brother.... I'm not gonna lie I was looking at this knife and I got really close to just ending it all.... I'm sorry I shouldn't be talking about this I'm probably being a burden right now, sorry.... Anyways how are you
great to see you and your aunt are better now, and like I expected when people suddenly behave differently after such a situation there often is something like that. that is why you need to return to them fast enough to make sure they don't form the wrong ideas or delusions in their head, since if you waited to much longer that way she reacted at first might have become her default, and she might even have gone further into it. ofcource if she is deeper into it already there are still a few tricks and strings you can pull, some can be very simple and effective, but ofcource only for if people actually start to turn fully hostile towards you or such.
so now you have a aunty wolf, not because she has wolves or such, but because now she knows about you, kind of like a inside joke.
try making it a game instead of a fear, make it like a fun game to hide it from people, that way it no longer is a fear, yet you don't have to actually show people or such, you overcome your fear without needing to overcome it by just twisting the aspect you focus on instead of being afraid of people seeing it, make it a fun challange to not let people see it, I only very rarely have had fears like that because often I just decided to instead of that just seeing it like playing and making it like something I did because it was fun to make sure people didn't know. if that doesn't work just think about the fun of them not being evil towards you whenever they figure out(since most people aren't even capable of handling even the smallest things.
and in a half jokingly way: make sure to keep going through many things.
there is truth in that, since I know that fixing all things you see as problems eventually often just leaves you bored without a propper challange, well in my case there is one mayor thing I need to reach, but right now I can't do much with most people in the world, since most people aren't even capable enough to think about or imagine it even, in your case you have some freedom which effectively makes you one of the exceptions in people, so someone who might help me in that challange of reaching complete freedom again(and fully whenever and however I want and feel like). you won't beleive what people these days think freedom is, they think opressing others or having money is freedom, while in reality capability, ability, understanding, feeling, and controll over yourself including in all those other fields that comes closer to freedom. in one of our shifts, even the accidental ones we already have more freedom than the average person will have in it's entire life combined these days.
I was willing to ask if you already visited your aunt, but that is answered now I see. 2 time, with the second being your most recent answer which I will read around now.
and I would kind of want to learn the opposite better, how to transform at any moment, without it being random triggered or when I am in a certain state where somehow my mind(and body) lets go of it's limits and works well and does what I need it to do.
the stronger smelling, hearing, and such are just early things, it goes much further, soon you might actually also be able to sense things, things you can't logically see or such, for example through a wall, or inside of someone(things like pain or such they have and where the pain comes from), you should also be able to feel the lines of the earth magnetic field easily without tools, and things going much further like actually doing things without physically needing to do them or be at that speciffic place/touching whatever you are affecting, changing "reality" itself.
you should indeed visit her, unless it is normal for her to ignore calls. since often when people say they are fine but also suddenly don't respond to calls or such, they aren't completely fine.
interesting possibility about the moon also affecting how far you transform, might actually be the case in many cases and it makes some sense that transformatons are more likely to be fuller around the full moon.
if I where to talk to your aunt however that would probably be pretty weird to her since she probably doesn't know me, so some random person from the internet having to explain such things to her can be quite confusing or strange to her, so it is best if you atleast first try to talk to her yourself. I could help deal with certain problems, ofcource you might also want her to tell what she saw so you know what things you want to talk about and which perhaps not, ofcource pay close attention to what she sais and how to see if she hides something, since if she does then either she actually might be afraid or confused and might already know more, or might even have talked about it with others.
that from the store person might be, quite often if criminals belong to a criminal gang law officials and many other people just let them go and do whatever they feel like afraid of getting attacked by them or other gang members. best thing is probably to find the gang as in who all are part of it and then in one go get rid of them, you might want to be carefull about how much mercy you give them however to much and they might just come back but that time they beleive they also are monsterhunters next to criminals(actual experience example of a uncle of mine who got rid of the entire criminal gang, he mostly used fear for that(so he didn't need to actually harm many), making them flee, but after some years(and after he died) they just came back again, and now they actually beleive they also are monsterhunters, they are stupid and terrible at almost anything but still have serious weapons. so due to that still dangerous possibly, those where such criminals so confident that they would just go around attacking random people in the open, so they had to be dealth with).
again your transformation issues in front of people might be partly caused by your fear of transforming in front of them, it is hard to know your real fears since bodies often tend to hide their true feelings from you, and so many things like fear are solely subconcious yet still there and causing serious problems. like how if you go biking over a ramp, you need enough speed or otherwise a accident happens, yet in most people the body subconciously sends signals to sabotage you and make you go slower actually causing a accident while you could actually have reached it easily if your body didn't have subconcious fears.
I get how looking back such things can be fun/funny, still however I hate such people. honnestly that person was a real monster/freak of nature, someone so blindly obedient and stupid that they feel the need and act on it to attack people for being no exact clone of them and their masters.
and yes can be great to talk with those which have similarities.
And yeah my Aunt says she's okay well I text her every time I try to call her she doesn't answer, but she texts me that she's fine, I'm still going to try to talk with her I haven't visited her ever since what happened I just feel kinda embarrassed about it,
And we'll you see when I went to go visit my Aunt I didn't transform all the way like I only transformed half of the way, I know it's weird I'm confused about it myself, but yeah I didn't transform all the way but I think it has something to do with the moon because at that time when I went to go visit my Aunt the moon wasn't completely full it was half full so it wasn't a full moon, and now that the moon has been full again I've been transforming normally you know I've been transforming fully into my wolf form....
And yeah I'll try to talk with her in person hopefully she's not mad at me or afraid of me and thanks for the advice, to you know, talk to my Aunt, I'll be sure to take your advices, and thank you in case I can't talk to her I will ask you if you could talk to my Aunt witch I really appreciate you offering to talk to her for me
And yeah I don't know much about my powers yet,
And yeah I noticed that I started being able to smell blood and animals, like one time my mom figure accidentally cut her self with the kitchen knife and I didn't even see her cut her self but I smelled her blood, and being able to smell animals felt kinda off for a little bit but now it just feels normal....
And yep it is very rare to find others who transform that is true....
And thank you for the advice I really appreciate it
And we'll I don't know how to really explain my transformation issues, I'm just pretty much struggling when I am close to accidently transforming in front of someone And it's so hard because I try not to transform in front of someone and when I feel myself about to fully transform I just end up just running away were know one can find me so myself can just transform I try to hold in my scream if I'm close to town and transforming and that can really be a bit pain
And we'll your qoustion about how I felt and how I reacted to the person calling me a freak of nature and a monster well I felt kinda what's the word I'm looking for uncomfortable and a bit embarrassed of myself but I also thought it was kinda funny I guess, and how I responded I just ran off.... I wasn't scared just felt what I just told you.... So yeah it was kinda fun for that person to call me those things hehehe....😁
And yeah it does feel good to talk about things with someone who can relate and understand you, and I am sorry for the way you've been treated you don't deserve that, and I think you're really cool and smart, and yeah it does seem like we have a lot in common
or just tell her that last part of what I told. she knows the truth probably, so no harm in hiding the truth. you lost controll because you where afraid of her knowing it, hiding the truth now again might cause similar problems.
otherwise I could try to talk to her.
well good thing you now have a extra contact person who you can more openly and safely talk about such things with. just check on her a few time, after all my friend started to become more like us after we had a fight for fun around full moon, don't know if it is because of any of those things or that he already was like us just dormant, but her bacame more like us, also I don't know if it would be due to scratch, bite, blood, moon, energy, fight, fun, etc.
but if your aunt is okay then it is good.
based on how she reacted she was suprised or shocked, not completely scared. you could go to her again sometimes perhaps give her some chokolate or flowers or such. I don't know what she saw, but you could actually even try to make her laugh about it so she doesn't see you like a threat and more like a cute baby wolf or such.
your outlash towards her was caused by fear. your change due to something else probably, I don't know what caused it, but it might have been just like those cases for me, mostly when it happens to me it is like that not fully moonsynced, while I do get more hyper and excited and stronger around full moons my transformations where much more random.
I also kind of expected you to change much more and not only on full moons, perhaps this what you experienced now started as one of those early side effects of getting closer to your real self, that happens early on. so the change might have actually started due to you feeling good or free of fun or something else asociated to yourself. there likely was some kind of a trigger, or just a feeling causing it, your aunt getting outside might have stalled the transformation somehow.
and you where very afraid of her seeing you like that, that is why you ran outside which isn't directly bad, but you feared her seeing you like that so much that while you where changing when she came outside your goal was that she shouldn't see or know about you so when she did see you your response was to attack her.
that is a completely normal response, which is why you shouldn't fear people you know seeing you, you might want to hide it from them but don't make them not knowing it a goal since then you get fear and become evil. you can train it by treating it like a game instead, where you just have to stay out of sight, but if they see you that is isn't bad, either see it as that they won and now need a reward, or be happy that they now know about it, or that you have to flee and get out of their vision again. or that you have to catch something for them as a reward for discovering it, or take them on a adventure or such. just first play many such things in your mind so that you will and can do them like the way you wanted it when that happened.
when you change, especially when you change on such a random moment. especially early on you will only know and do exactly what you want and feel like. so your fear of having her know it, caused you to attack her once she knew it.
I know some things that can help you to reduce the chances of accidentally shifting when you don't want to, but it is better to know the exact issues you are facing, since you want to atleast keep changing regularly so you can keep doing it instead of it being something that only randomly happens, trust me at that one. if you shift more often, perhaps early on you might shift more on accident, but later on you will shift less on accident when you don't want it and shift more when you want it, including on accident when you secretly want it or feel like it.
I know a few who are actually tallented, but those that actually atleast have changed seem to be really rare, most are just ones with lesser or smaller or different things you notice it in/from. physically I really only know a few, and other than myself I haven't seen any of them change for how far I am aware. I have heard stories about one of my cousins who I had trained a lot when we where your from my aunt(his mother) but that was only once and while he was asleep, I wasn't there so only know what my aunt has told. then there is that friend of me that started to get many changes after we had some fights for fun(was around a full moon in case it is important), don't know of him physically changing but the first next full moon after that he described something that was quite similar to what I had just before one of my shifts. so it seems like he might be able to atleast at some point do it. other than that most people are from my family, but most only have slight things you notice it in, most also only in very speciffic small things and not in a wide field. most of them just have some of those extra tallents and traits, but not the full reach or changes or such. many of them are just like a hybride, kind of like humans or normal people with a few werewolf or werewolf like traits and/or abilities.
but sadly they are rare to find publickly, probably however since most will and would and do hide their true identity from most people there might be many more we just don't know about, perhaps going around drawing enough attention at the right moments might work, just be carefull of bad people, or just searcing around on the right moments.
there also might be some groups from which some might be real one with contacts to more underground groups(hiding groups), I know such groups exist since most people like us with tallents and powers tend to not tell it to most people, but many of us want to make changes to make it so we can be more open or safe or such, since right now openly showing it to humanity will just get you bad people after you, there are even people speciffically searching for those like us. and I know there are groups of people like us protecting those like us(people with powers and tallents) from such bad people, I have been in such a group long ago, so I am positive there still are groups like that now, if you can find and get into such a group you likely will find quite some tallented werewolves between them since after all they are people like us protecting and helping those like us.
and I am not suprised at all you still don't know what you can do with your powers and the extend to which they go, I already knew that for quite long.
it goes much further, probably even much further than you would be willing to beleive and accept right now. that you now smell blood and animals is great. also to sense emotions, humans give of very clear smells based on what they eat and what emotions they feel in that moment, dogs and such as well, other animals also, but I personally can only smell emotions well in humans and dogs and wolves and such for what I know and have confirmed now. smelling things on a distance is also nice and tasting it using smell can be nice sometimes especially at restaurants if you are unsure what to order, and to detect things in the air or problems.
but it goes much further than just physical senses, I forgot which one I concidered safe to mention right now, oh I remember some.
you can feel metals and some other thigns, even without touching them eventually, kind of like x-ray sensing. 2 easy ways to notice it or train it, you might actually already have noticed one of them, for mettals there is a speciffic alloy which gives a really irritating feeling, if you find that you will directly notice it, after that you should be aware enough to sense and recognise other materials. in some antiques it was used kind of like a cheaper fake silver, you can also try to test it with many old coins, some coins used that same(similar) alloy in some countries for a short amount, and since you now know about it you can try to sense it better and perhaps directly notice the harder to notice ones.
what you want to feel are things that feel like irritating, or painfull and sometimes like electric or like needles sometimes more around the skin sometimes in your bones and joints, I could do this well enough to actually detect the metals of many coins blindly and without equipment succesfully(test a cousin of my set up since he didn't beleive I could actually feel it, even though making him touch that alloy also directly gives him a irritating feeling).
using this same I can also detect some forms of radiation and electricity, for example I can detect problems in people and where those problems come from just by sensing it.
IR or heat is also easy to test. I first realized this when I was playing with a rc car I was planning on heavily tuning to make it super fast, I took it and it felt warm, yet when inspecting it well the bottom wasn't warm at all, but I speciffically felt like a few speciffic spots where warm, when I opened it up those speciffic spots indeed turned out to be hot, the ones that I felt as being most hot also where the hottest so I felt the heat even though there was a cold layer of plastic in between my hand and the hot parts.
you can easily learn those but it goes much, much, much further. but the further the harder it is for me to explain and teach them in controlled ways, many of the more advanced things like transformation are just things I tend to feel and do on feeling in some moments. things like almost instantly healing even bigger wounds, avoiding fatigue, getting much stronger and faster, seeing much better in the dark, giving people a certain message and/or feeling using only your eyes or mind, and things that again go much, much, much further more beyond the fields that people would call magic where there doesn't seem to be any sensible link to the body anymore, kind of changing the world or all of reality, even though I think the shift also comes closer to these things than many of the more easy things seem to.
just trust me it goes much further and much more extreme than what I told, and in many more ways, there are also some good things or moments as well, but the more serious bad things I tend to keep to myself, didn't even mention them in the autoblocked text but now that other stuff misses as well. just know that I also have tons of experience with people seeing me as a waste of space or worse due to the very reason of me being different from them, and being capable in things. since in many things I am far better than most people.
you are right it is good to talk about things. and finding someone who truly understands you is hard, many would claim it to be impossible, I know it to be possible, since I know about some creatures which actually understand one fully.
but those tend to not be human and not get here in a full physical humanlike form most of the time, more it is just visiting in other places.
but I can relate to how you have been treated. I am not depressed(I think), but people actually got really mad at me for not being depressed after they figured out some parts about my past. in our past and how we where treated we share quite a lot in common it seems. most people focussed on blaming all bad things on me and shoving all punishments on me, as well as just trying to abuse me. this also included very close people. one of my parents actually beleived me to be a evil monster that if not stopped would destroy the world in the future. the other parent went along with that instead of telling such things happen more often in the family(even though I am a much stronger case than the others in genral). so I was often just locked up in places where they would try random other punishments, or some old ones like one gas with a very annoying stinking smell, I also almost never was allowed to do anything most of the time I had to be in my room and they would come check every few minutes to make sure I wasn't doing someting like playing or training in any way other than what they desired. they constantly wanted to force me to watch gamble gamble gamble with them(you know those stupid tv shows which are just about stupid people gambling without thinking or such. they also where very open about that I hold no value to them and they constantly say that I am a moster and so hold less value than them because I am a monster and so should just be a pet or slave obeying them and doing all things nobody wants to do. a example is for example if we eat I have to wait untill all others including my brothers and sisters are done and am only allowed to eat a part of what is left,(part because sometimes they decide they liked the food and that they want to take it with them to work or school or such and because they also tend to give a part to our dog(which is very misbehaving), sometimes I just don't get food, and that isn't because we are poor, actually my family and household is super rich, my parents make more in a month than a normal family here would make in a year.
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