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What Conflict Type Am I?

11 Questions - Developed by: - Developed on: 2022-10-12 - 173 taken

Arguments can be quite unpleasant. And every person reacts to them differently.
Some people seem to almost enjoy them and have them under control, others find them awful and avoid them as much as possible. Conflicts are unavoidable in our everyday lives. No matter with whom we quarrel, the way we react to them is usually pre-programmed. But how do you deal with conflicts, and how do you feel about them?
The Thomas & Kilmann model is based on five different conflict types. In this test, you will find out which one you are! You will be asked questions about yourself and presented with different scenarios that you have to evaluate.
Good luck!

1

First of all, how do you feel during a conflict situation?

Quite okay, actually. I use the situation to test my power and limits.
Somewhat helpless, in the end I never have the upper hand in the conflict.
Quite terribly. I really need to get out of there.
Conflicts are not nice, but there is always a solution. Therefore rather calm.
Tense and nervous.

2

What is one of your best qualities?

I help where I can and am therefore very appreciated.
I am the friend who waits for you when you need to tie your shoes.
I always act fairly and am therefore much respected.
I am very ambitious.
I am a very peaceful person.

3

And what is one of your worst qualities?

I do not empathize well with others.
I can't openly tell a person my opinion if I didn't like something.
I am sometimes a bit too naive.
When something unfair happens, I snap.
I have too high expectations of others.

4

Which of these is most true about your childhood?

My family was always there to protect me.
I had a good childhood with great role models.
I was often left to my own devices. My parents were often busy, my relationship with them was good to normal.
My parents/family were quite dismissive of me.
My childhood was anything but great. That's all I want to say about it.

5

Imagine you're on a train. A ticket inspector comes by and a man who doesn't speak English has bought the wrong ticket. The ticket inspector doesn't understand the man, gets angry and wants to fine the man. Do you intervene?

I offer to give the man a ride on my ticket (it is valid for one more person).
I try to calm the ticket inspector down and negotiate with him so that he does not punish the man. After all, the man had a ticket.
I offer myself as a translator because of the language barrier.
I don't make other people's problems mine and look at my phone.
I snap at both of them. Seriously such a fuss over such a problem?

6

Imagine you have a group project. There are 4 of you and 2 have already chosen what part they will do. The third person wants to do very little and dump most of the work on you. How do you act?

That's not fair at all, I'll work it out with the person. Maybe the person can do something simple that still requires effort.
His/her arguments sound good and I'm afraid people will think I don't want to do anything. I take it over and show how hardworking I am.
I'm not going to be dealt with like that. I'm very annoyed and will make sure the person can't talk their way out of it. Really cheeky.
I get the other two on board as well. Maybe we can find out why the person doesn't want to do anything. After all, it's everybody's business.
I try to get out of it the same way. Then the person annoys the others and I'm fine.

7

How intimidating do others find you? 0 = not intimidating at all, 10 = totally intimidating

6-7, I don't get fooled and I can defend myself well
This differs a lot from person to person...but maybe 4-5?
9-10, some people are kind of afraid of me
2, I'm not predictable, but don't hurt anyone
0, nobody is really afraid of me, rather the other way around...

8

Do your conflicts often escalate?

No, I usually just escape the conflict
Yes, I often clash with others
Sometimes, when the conflict has gone on for too long and someone loses patience
It has happened, but rather rarely
No, I don't want it to come to that

9

How direct are you? 1 = not at all direct, 10 = extremely direct

8-10, the facts have to be on the table.
Usually more like a 6, but depending on the situation sometimes significantly more.
I am as indirect as possible. 1.
Maybe 2-3? I am sometimes a bit vague, but my counterpart usually already understands what I mean.
I am in the middle range, 4-5.

10

How much do you stand up for yourself in a conflict?

I try, but usually my opponent wins with better arguments...
I totally stand up for myself. Anyone who starts a fight with me has lost already. I defend myself.
If I do, then passively, by removing myself from the conflict and thus doing myself a favor.
I stand up for myself AND the other person. There are always two people in a conflict and both are important. Or not?
I stand up for myself no matter what. But I also know that sometimes not everything always goes 100% the way you want it to.

11

Would you manipulate people in a conflict to solve it?

Yes, but only when someone is completely out of line. I want to enforce the good, and for that I would try to steer the conversation in the right direction.
I often get the feeling that I am the one who gets manipulated. I don't do that myself.
Some people have to be forced to be happy, so yes.
No, I couldn't do that.
Yes, because I ultimately want to get my way.

Comments (1)

Angella (00629)

89 days ago

For 45% you are: The Rejector: Avoidance

Accurate.

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