What your STD's say about you...

Find out things that your doctor didn't want to tell you about your STD's! What secrets are they keeping from you?

Question 1:   How many STD's have you had in the past year?

Question 2:   Do you normally experience...
A horrible itching, open oozing sores, and discoloration
A horrible itching
Open oozing sores

Question 3:   When did your doctor first notice an oozing sore on your genitals?
Don't have oozing sores
Age seven

Question 4:   Have you recently or ever visited...
A strip club
A bar

Question 5:   When you first noticed your "problem", you...
Shrugged and said, "Damn it! Not again, I took all that F@#*ing medication!"
Poked at it with a toothpick
Screamed in horror and dialed 911

Question 6:   The first one you went to with your problem was...
Your priest
Your doctor
Back to your STD support group

Question 7:   The first people you told about your STD was...
Your german shepard-Hey, he has a right to know too!
Your girlfriend
Your boyfriend

Question 8:   Your medical treatment included...
A cream and an antibiotic
A rubber mallet

Question 9:   The advice you remember most is...
Always use a condom
Save yourself and everyone else the trouble and just kill yourself now
Keep it in your pants

Question 10:   Rate your pain, with 10 being the worst

Question 11:   What is your favorite past-time?
Watching TV
Going clubbing
Hanging out at the Methadone clinic

Question 12:   You are a...
German Shepard

Question 13:   What is the pick-up lines that you typically hear?
"I lost my number, can I have yours?"
"Hey, didn't I see you at the Gonerrea convention last week?"
"Your STD or mine?"

Question 14:   What pick-up line do you use...
"Did it hurt...When you fell from heaven?"
"Let's talk about a sore subject...HERPES!"
"Will you be my Clamydia sponsor?"

Question 15:   What was the doctor's opinion on your recovery?
"You'll be fine after this one incident, if you use the cream"
"You'll be dead in a week, until then, we can schedule surgery to make you more comfortable"
"You'll be on Valtrex for the rest of your life, sorry"

This Quiz has been designed by Bobbie Jo Velazquez & David Lyons.