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Advice To Having The Best Life EVER!

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5 Chapter - 1.386 Words - Developed by: - Developed on: - 836 taken- The story is completed

Don't take what I say TOO seriously, although at least semi-consider my opinions. Beware my own incompetence.

    1
    Physically

    1.
    Eat healthily! I know it’s hard, but you really don’t want to live your life surviving solely on junk food. Healthy food—greens, some grains, not ice cream; you’ve heard the lectures—is good for you, as the name implies. 🥦😪 Stick to it for the majority of your diet, and you’ll be happy when you do. However, life isn’t so cruel that you can’t go snack on the comfort foods every once in a while; YOU ARE AN AWESOME PERSON. Treat yourself! 🍬🍭🧁🍕

    2.
    You don’t need to work out to be super physically fit. Just kidding. You do. If you want to get committed to exercising regularly (no, I didn’t say exorcising), you need to be dedicated. Get it on your schedule, and despite the soreness and aches of the moment, the long-term benefits are incredible. You’ll learn to look forward to the exercise sessions, although if you dread them, you should probably stop, at least for a little while. 💪

    3.
    And your personal safety. This is important. There are people out there who are dangerous, and they’ll stop at nothing to get… anything. Following those lines, there’s sexual health. If you’re an eight-year-old or something, you needn’t worry about this much. But protect yourself. I suggest you learn some self-defense. Martial arts are a good thing to start, and they’ll also help you get in good exercise. Just don’t go walking down any dark alleyways at night, please. scar

    2
    Mentally

    1.
    Oh dear. I don't even know where to start here. But most of your very being, your personality, your senses with which you connect to the world, and your mind in which your thoughts and pains are felt, all that is up here. *taps head* Right up here in the noggin. You need to respect that. You need to take care of it. Be smart.

    2.
    And then there's that cruel thing which we all have. That nagging little voice in the back of your head. No, not that you forgot to turn off the coffee maker. Yes, of course I drink coffee. No, I actually dislike tea. Anyway, we're getting off track. That fear. Everyone has it whether they like it or not. The fear of death. Now, you might be afraid of a lot of things (exes, heights, germs, monsters, coffee makers), and I don't know what they are. But I'm sure I can say accurately that you're afraid of death. Everyone is. Even those celebrities who say otherwise. Even those mountaintop monks. Even ME, which I know must be shocking to you. But death happens. It's a fact of life. 💀 We just need to live with it.

    3.
    THERE IS NO AFTERLIFE. I’m not trying to bust up your religion or whatever, but face it. It’s scientifically impossible.

    4.
    I’m not trying to turn this into a sob story, but a friend of mine died last year of a Stage-3 brain tumor he never told anyone about. It turned out that he had had it his head for several years, and he revealed in the hospital that he had always suspected it to be there. He used to get splitting migraines, along with other symptoms, and he would stay home from school for days at a time. He died, very painfully. And he could have done something about it. It was years after he realized he had it that he was diagnosed. If he had told someone about it earlier, he might have lived. The point is, always have a confident. Someone you trust with your deepest, darkest secrets. Then you won’t get into my friend’s situation, and its result.

    3
    Socially 1. Now, a person by his/herself might not be stupid. They might, in fact, be extremely intelligent. However, unfocus on that singular person,
    Socially

    1.
    Now, a person by his/herself might not be stupid. They might, in fact, be extremely intelligent. However, unfocus on that singular person, and expand your vision to people as a whole. PEOPLE ARE STUPIDS. In fact, they’re so stupids that they probably haven’t noticed my deliberate typoos. Yup. Those were all totally on purpose. Anyway, people can be complete idiots. Please take this to heart and know that people influence each other too greatly. So one idiot spreads into seven billion idiots. Again, one, singular, person might be pretty damn smart, but people as a whole? Stupids.

    2.
    This one will weird you out. Look at the picture on the chapter. Yeah, I know you were wondering what was up with that. Answer me this: is that sofa just so adorable? Or is it REALLY F***ING TERRIFYING? Now, I don't really care what you said, so I'll get straight to the point: you have an opinion. You are unique, therefore your opinion is unique. It follows that everyone has a unique opinion. Now, one of my favorite sayings is something that I have revised it from, “Opinions are like assholes: everyone has one, and most of them stink,” to, “Opinions are like armpits: almost everyone has one, and lots of them stink.” Because really, you could make this saying far more vulgarly colorful, and yet it would still make sense. (I know that maybe some people don’t have an armpit or two, but whatever. Sorry if you’re armpit-less. And my pits smell great, too, so THERE.) Once you realize that people all have different opinions, and that that is perfectly fine, you’ll be much happier.

    3.
    Love is hard. That’s all I’m gonna say about that. It can be really, really hard. But hang in there.

    4
    The Future of Humanity

    Yes, I realize this has precious little to do with the subject I’ve been talking about: you. Unfortunately for you, though, you’re going to read this because I feel philosophical now, and also, this is fun and I’m bored.
    Humans have evolved into where we are now in just a few million years. A million is a thousand times a thousand, yeah? So a lot of years, but whatever.
    In four and a half billion years, our sun will blow up, taking Mercury, Venus, Earth, and maybe Mars with it. It’ll be a tragic event, no doubt, but where will humanity be then? Far, far away.
    Do you even realize how big a billion is? It’s a million (which is 1,000 x 1,000) times a thousand! For a point of reference to just how gargantuan a number this is, imagine ten very very large crates chock full of hundred dollar bills. That’s how much money it is. How many years it is is very hard to imagine.
    Well, anyway, we’ll be off conquering other galaxies and such by then. So how are humans going to die out, if we no longer have any natural predators (guess we killed them all), and the sun won’t prove a problem?
    We’re all going to destroy each other, that’s how!
    As previously stated, people are idiots. And although in 4.5 billion years we’ll have a population very very very very large, and will hence be very hard to kill us all off, it’ll happen, although maybe gradually. We’ll interbreed with too many aliens👽, and we’ll simply drift away, like a forgotten memory, never to be found again…

    5
    Thanks for sticking through with my rant till the end! I hope my advice helps in any way!

Comments (27)

autorenew

Yesterday
Oh that's funny! A couple years ago my sister kept talking about something called "rubber-nosed swamp donkeys" which I completely thought she made it up... and it wasn't until recently that I discovered that "rubber-nosed swamp donkey" is another name for a moose.🤪
Yesterday
Huh interesting! My dad totally didn’t know narwhals are real until a year or two ago, it was so funny!
Yesterday
Heh heh i just realized TDM stands for time-division mulitplexing and now i've learned something new
Wikipedia says: Time-division multiplexing is a method of transmitting and receiving independent signals over a common signal path by means of synchronized switches at each end of the transmission line so that each signal appears on the line only a fraction of time in an alternating pattern.
I had no idea this was a thing
Yesterday
Thanks, LydiaGrace60! I appreciate your opinion!
Currently, scientists are having a hard time explaining cognitive thought, so I won't argue you on that subject.
Here's something that popped into my head just now: Smithsonian magazine had an article about bonobos developing language skills that I'd like to recommend. You could probably find it somewhere on the web. It only adds to conscious thought's mystery: why did HUMANS only develop it? And since some great apes c an speak thru sign language and such it makes me wonder if there'll be great apes walking around society one day...

Wishing y'all the best with corona going on,
TDM
2 days ago
The Dancing Minstrel, so sorry! I have a friend called TheFadedWalker500 and I guess I got you mixed up.
2 days ago
Thank you for not being angry at my rudeness☺️, The Faded Minstrel! Once again, I am so sorry about that!

We both have strong beliefs and we won’t change each other’s minds by arguing. I can see your reasoning, I just don’t agree with it. Interesting thing- you believe in things science proves. How did you get to that conclusion? Through thought. Can science explain thought? It’s an interesting conundrum, I think.
To me, it’s just not logical for everything to come from nothing. It had to be orchestrated by an amazing being.

Thank you for your opinion!
2 days ago
Aw 😊 you're welcome
I'm glad it helped!
2 days ago
just got out of therapy and this advice helped me thank you
3 days ago
LydiaGrace60,

Thanks for apologizing! I'm not offended, though.
I'm not going to argue with you on the things you pointed out! And I agree with you: religious people can be scientific.
I'm just saying that religion ISN'T scientific. So it's not for me.
When I was religious, I loved God so much I would do anything for Him. But when I realized that it just doesn't make sense, I was done. I can't be converted back and I don't want to be. I appreciate you wanting to help me, but I'm going to pass.
I am a lover of science fiction, and I recently read a novel (Sphere by Michael Crichton. It's really good and kind of scary as a warning!) that emphasized heavily on how the chance of there being alien life in other solar systems is so infinitesimal. Because life on Earth coming into being was a series of coincidences that were so full of pure chance that similar circumstances happening in another solar system are supremely miniscule.
You argued that every single thing thing works together perfectly. With animal life, this is called symbiosis, and it is the product of evolution, a series of chances formed from adaptation to the environment. Yes, the earth is the perfect distance from the sun. So is Mars. Both planets in the "life zone", a region in many solar systems in which life can safely develop. This is why life could potentially develop on Mars. Additionally, did God ever tell mortals this?
Doesn't the Bible state that God made Earth approximately 6000 years ago? And doesn't scientific FACT, proven to be true, state that it was created 4.5 billion years ago?
I haven't even gotten started on death. When you're dead, YOU ARE DEAD. In order for "death" to be considered death, medically, your brain has to have died. You are dead. There is nothing you can do about it, because you are dead. Seeing as you are dead, you have no capacity to feel or know or think or do literally anything. I wish there was a heaven, but it just is impossible. AND PLEASE DON'T GET STARTED ON ME ABOUT A PERSON'S SPIRIT.
LydiaGrace60, just for one moment, can you please look at this problem from my perspective? Can you try to see the reason behind it? You don't have to agree, I just want you to be aware.
And hey, you know, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe when I die I'll go to hell and pay for my sins.
That's when I'll change my mind.
But for now I'm going to stick to my opinion. I honestly appreciate you wanting to help me, and maybe if you'd tried a few years earlier I would have given in. Not today though.

Good luck,
The Dancing Minstrel
35 days ago
I apologize for being rude with my other comments, I didn’t think before I commented and I’m sorry for that.

Becca Flamestar, what do I have to learn? Why don’t you believe in God? Just wondering.
35 days ago
Well, it’s the only logical explanation. We can think, and earth’s the perfect distance from the sun. How could it all just randomly come from nothing for no reason? How could everything be so perfect, down to the atom and up to the universe? Wouldn’t you think that if it all evolved the world would be a mess? We wouldn’t be here. So where did we come from? If it’s the Bible you don’t believe, well, it never contradicts itself. If it were a story book, why would it be so specific? Why would someone create such an elaborate lie?

Everything I see, from the sunset to my dog, shows me there is a God.
46 days ago
Lydia Grace, 🤦🏼‍♀️ *Shakes head* you have much to learn. Why do you think that there is a god? Just wondering.
66 days ago
Yes.Yup.Yep.Yeah.Yo.
66 days ago
Also sorry I made four comments but I keep thinking of new things. I’m sorry if I sounded, I don’t know, rude or commanding. But I truly want to help you.
66 days ago
Also think about watching the debate between Ken Ham and Bill Nye just to see what they say. :)
66 days ago
Oh. My. Word.Anyone who thinks Christians cannot be scientific is very small minded. Ever heard of Answers in Genesis? I feel very sorry for you. If you believe in evolution I feel even sorrier for you. How can you think that literally everything came from nothing? Every single thing works together perfectly. How could that have happened by chance? It had to have been created by an amazing, powerful being. Everything has a purpose. And yes, there is a heaven. Listen, The Dancing Minstrel. God loves you. He wants you to love Him. Please don’t throw away your life this way.
Atheism is a religion fyi.
118 days ago
Thank you for commenting Drama Queen! (sorry i noticed the comment kind of late)
I feel like I should let you all know that I am an atheist because I am also a scientific person. My immediate family is like me, but my extended family on my mom's side are all Catholics. Me and my close family used to be religious, but then my mom started questioning. How is this possible? Scientifically, and such?
We feel it isn't. Scientifically, there cannot be a Heaven, a God, or any of those things that come with religion.
I agree with what is scientifically proven to be possible, and therefore I am firmly NOT religious. But it wasn't right of me to just burst out with my thoughts on here, where others can read it. So those of you who were offended by this fanfic, I am SO sorry.
It wasn't right of me, so I feel I owe you religious an apology.
That's all for my rant. Minstrel out.🙃
136 days ago
I don’t believe in afterlife either! Sorry, for offending those of you who do. I’m an atheist or an agnostic.
139 days ago
Thx, TheQuizzyAddict!
I got kinda passionate in this 😅 Sorry
Srsly, tho, the couch scared me out of my MIND although I don't think anybody could look like it 😕
144 days ago
that couch looks like me tbh