Are you an animal lover?
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Are you an animal lover?

Alot of people like animals, some are alright, some are a waste of fucking space. Take mice, they are shit. Nuff said. (By the way I never done this and it will be crap)

Question 1:You see a little helpless bird stuck in a barb wire fence. Do you ..
Rush desperately to the helpless creature, wiping a tear from your eye as you run. Then help it out of the wire, causing more damage to yourself than the bird has ever done in its life.
Walk past and think "Ahh fuck it, it'll be alright"
Walk casually over to it and squeeze its head in your hands until you hear that satisfying "crack" and then wipe your hands on a cow.

Question 2:You see a man beating his dog with his bare hands. Do you....
Call the RSPCA, quoting the exact minute, second, millisecond that the dog was struck.
Walk on by, secretly chuckling insanely to yourself, then tell all your mates, in full detail, how amazing it was.
Bez it up to the dog with a smile, then drop a slab on the poor fuckers face.

Question 3:A mouse is caught in a mousetrap, but it is still wriggling about. Do you...
Use some tissue to pick it up and take it to the vet.
Look it it squirm for a bit, then release it back into the house so it can fuck up the curtains and then get trapped again.
Push the trap down really really hard so it squeaks, then stamp on his tail. Then his Body.

Question 4:You see a horserider whipping his/her horse to make it go faster. Do you...
Already know that this is acceptable and think nothing of it.
Secretly hope she hits it harder, maybe until it bleeds.
Physically piss yourself laughing at the sight of a defenceless creature being whipped.

Question 5:You tread on a dogs tail. Do you...
Immediately get down to eye level with it and start talking in bollocks language to it, and then not be able to sleep for a few days cuz of the guilt.
Secretly pretend you don't know your standing on it and put a little more pressure on.
Tell that bitch to shut up and snap its jaw off with a vice.

Question 6:You are asked to work on a ship, you find out it is a Japanese whaling vessel. Do you...
Vain yourself to the captain and demand a phonecall to greenpeace.
Pretend you are appauled, but when you are safely back in your cabin, get naked, dowse yourself in whales blood and stab a picture of a whale.
Go absolutely mental, use the harpoon to shoot at anything that moves, including seagulls, turtles and plankton.

Question 7:There is a fly on the wall. Do you...
Kill it, its only a fly.
Kill it, but then smear it as well.
Kill it, smear it, lick it, eat it, shit it out,. smear it again.

Question 8:Monkeys are cool! You see one. Do you...
Gently offer it a banana, with a massive smile on your face, blissfully enjoying the moment.
Drop your pants and throw some of your own faeces at it. That'll stop the fucker next time.
Blow his head off with a combat shotgun, then rip him up with a wild dog.

Question 9:You are in the rainforest and see a sloth. Do you...
Admire its incredible lifestyle, and the graceful way it moves.
Feel like smashing in its face with a hammer, after all, it can't escape.
Actually do smash his face in with a hammer, slowly walking behind it for an hour before, pulling on his tail and teasing it until it crys.

Question 10:A cow.
A lovely bovine creature, mostly called daisy.
"Its eyes are on the side of its head ... KILL IT"
Gut the fucking thing, then chuck its carcass in a flaming pit.

This Quiz has been designed by The Hatebreeder.